YAWA - Your Gardening Year Ahead
Most magazines and newspapers at this time of year have many an article stuffed with predictions for the year ahead, so the staff here at You Ask, We Answer have lost no time in consulting our resident psychic, Madame Zelda for this month's YAWA special feature. As you can see she's gazed long and hard into her trusty blue ball to see what lies ahead for all of our gardening fraternity in 2009. Southern hemisphere gardeners please note: do start your consultation at the summer section and you too (or should that be two? Ed.) will be amazed at the uncanny accuracy of her predictions. If you don't, you'll believe she's as prescient as Harry Potter's Professor Trelawny.
Shortly after our YAWA staff photographer departed with the above shot, the murky mists of the blue ball parted to reveal all. Luckily I remained to translate Madame Zelda's mutterings and wailings into something resembling modern English:
Mid to late Winter
The Moon in sixpence warns you must be careful when catching up with all your garden clearing tasks left over from late autumn/early winter. For example, you never know when that hoe or rake accidentally left out may be found in a most unexpected (and painful) fashion.
Mars in opposition in May means you need to take heed. A warning from a mysterious stranger (probably the allotment committee in my case - Ed.) shows you need to focus on the task in hand, else all will be lost.
At this point, the mists once again drew their veil over Madame Zelda's blue ball and she became incoherent. I've returned her to her caravan for plenty of rest and recuperation in time for next year's predictions. After a schooner of sweet sherry she did rally slightly before relapsing into complete gibberish. Her final (hoarse) words were:
Heed the wisdom of the blue mists and all will be well in your garden this year. Ignore my warnings at your peril.
Happy gardening for 2009 everyone ;)